6w6d

Today has been a bad day. I woke up at 3:30 this morning and could not go back to sleep. I went downstairs at 5 to eat some cereal because I was feeling hungry.. I think. My stomach was hurting, I think from laying on my back. I'm usually a side sleeper but when I'm pregnant I want to sleep on my back, even though I'm not suppose to.. weird. Anyway, I still couldn't go to sleep, until about 6. Finally, asleep. Then an hour later, August wakes up. I made Matt get him because I just wanted to sleep. I slept until 8:15 with August laying next to me watching "skateboards, skateboards, skateboards".
The day was going ok, but by 12, I was feeling really sick. My stomach was hurting, I just felt like crap. We had already made plans to go to Orcutt Brew for lunch, because I wanted their BLT so bad. Of course we got there and I was still icky feeling, the food was brought to us and I just couldn't even look at it! We got it all to go and headed back home.
I ate half of it when we got home, but then I took a poop. I think instead of throwing up, I poop. It's kind of weird, but I swear it's true.
I still feel like SH*T, just laying in bed with August as he naps. I think I need to do that too. I think my stomach is expanding. I feel big, my pants are tight, I get really uncomfortable with stuff around my stomach. I'm only 7 weeks, this shouldn't be happening so soon.
Ok, sleep time?

Due August 23, 2011

Today we had another doctor's appointment. We finally heard the heartbeat and it was so REAL that I am pregnant. The doctor gave me a due date of August 23, but I have a feeling I will have this baby sooner. I also have a feeling it is a boy, and I would be lying if I said I didn't care...because I do really want a girl. But of course the most important thing is, this baby is healthy.
I have been so freaking tired lately, it's unreal. All I want to do is sleep. I am fine until about 2, then I crash. I usually take August upstairs and have him lay in bed with me. I don't really ever sleep, but just laying down feels so good!
The doctor told me to walk a few times a day, because I told him I was concerned with my weight. I gained about 35 pounds with August, and this time I'm starting heavier than I was when I got pregnant with August.
Oh and about the due date, our 5 year wedding anniversary is August 19, so I'm hoping the baby doesn't come on that day!
I go back January 19th (Miss Olivia's birthday!). I don't know if he will do another ultrasound or not. I feel like my doctor does a lot of them compared to some of my friends' doctors.
I'm going to try and take a nap now, August is snoring next to me, we are both bundled up in blankets, it's really windy and cold outside!

Doctor's appointment.

So...this was an interesting day.
I got to my doctors new clinic. He used to be with Dr. Callahan, who delivered August, but we chose Dr. Dillon because we saw him a lot more and I really like him and so does Matt. Anyway, it was a nice new building, clean, quite, relaxing..unlike the other office that was loud and people always rushing in and out.
After peeing in the cup, getting my weight (GROSS) and blood pressure, we went into the room to change.
The doctor came in and he did an ultrasound. He had this weird look on his face I thought.. and then he said.. well it looks like you are really early in this pregnancy, about 2 weeks different than what your period would calculate it. So instead of being 6w6d, I'm 5 weeks! So we have to go back next Wednesday, and hopefully then we will see the heartbeat. He said there is nothing to be worried about, it is just really early to see anything. I was kind of disappointment because I felt like I needed to see the heartbeat to be more excited.
So next week we go back at 9:45. I'm hoping there will be a big change in the size of the baby and we can see the heartbeat! I also have no due date because he wants to wait until we get a heartbeat.

Again this will post on Thursday night, instead of Wednesday!

6 weeks & 5 days.

I am pregnant. I took a test on Friday, December 10th, after being 8 days late on my period.. and to not my suprise because I just knew I was..it said PREGNANT. I mean, yes, I would be lying if I didn't say I was shocked to see those words, but I knew I was pregnant for the second we had sex (TMI sorry).
Baby #2 is due August 11, 2011. Really funny to think that so much has happened in August AND our son is named August!
I have different feelings about this pregnancy. I am really excited, but I think I hide it in more than I did when I was pregnant with August. I am more scared, even though I know what it is like to raise a baby into a toddler, I have never raised a baby into a toddler with a toddler!
I am also scared because I keep having nightmares about something being wrong with this baby. Tomorrow we go for our first doctors appointment and we will have an ultrasound. I think once I see & hear the heartbeat I will feel a little bit better. August loves my stomach already before I got pregnant, but now he's like all over it kissing it and everything. I can't wait to see what he will be like when it's a huge pregnant belly!
I am making a scapbook from August's first ultrasound until he was born. Doing this is making me relax more I think, even though I hate scrapbooking!
Oh and I am writing this on Tuesday, but it will not post until Thursday because Matt's parents still don't know and I don't know if she reads my blog or not!

YAAAHHHTAAAHHH

I passed my GED.
I am excited because I really thought that I would never take it, let alone pass it!

Friendship

Danielle and I have been friends for almost 15 years. This last year has probably been the most challenging. We have been through so many ups and downs, but have both come out on top and are better friends because of it. I love Danielle like she was my sister, or my better half. I can bitch to her about things going on in my life and I know she will listen and give me advice.
August also loves Danielle very much. As soon as we pull up to her house, he gets really excited. He knows exactly where we are. He calls Danielle, DeDe. She is so good to August and sometimes when I see them together it melts me heart!
I love you Danielle!

Life is hard..

So life is really hard right now.. but I feel bad saying that, because in other's eyes my life probably isn't hard. We have our health, food on the table, and a roof over our head. But in MY life, I think right now is hard.
We have been approved for a loan modification on our house, which is great, except for the fact that we are SO behind on our property taxes, HOA dues, and second mortgage. We stopped paying all of that when we stopped paying our first mortgage. We could accept our first mortgage payment of $879, but we still have to pay $180 HOA a month, $250 for our second mortgage, and save at least $200 a month to be able to pay our property taxes every year. So basically we are saving only $200 a month with this new loan modification.

I don't know if this was God saying something to me or what...but I went on-line to look for rentals, which I haven't done in a LONG time, but this one house that I looked at back in June, that got rented, is now for rent again. It is right down the street from our house and it's 2 bedrooms but with a really nice backyard. It is really nice and I really liked it.
Basically Matt and I sat down tonight and decided.. do we keep the house or not.
Is it really worth us having to deal with grumpy ass old man, paying lots of money on back property taxes and HOA dues..
I know that if we decide to leave the house, it will be sad, but almost like a new beginning..
I just want some advice.. some prayer..
thanks!